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Can your mother be just nasty?

Can your mother be just nasty?


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In jokes, though, we all know families where mother and mother are good at each other.

Can your mother be just nasty?

When you finally get a meeting with your friend, sooner or later you are asked, "And what is your mother?" You also bet that he is just discussing the weddings in his own company. It would be really frustrating if it really happened just accidentally to see what kind of mother-in-law she was. We can't hold our hand this way, either it is up to uswhat kind of relationship we will have with our mother.What's the quickest way to reformulate your request: How do you approach your relationship? You don't feel so serviceable in a given situation, even if your mom really expects a lot, catches everything, nothing comes to her, knows everything better, and goes into everything ... Sure she does, but how you react to these challenges. Since this is a long-term relationship, it is worthwhile you translate energy to create an acceptable way of working for everyone, as your request and your child are affected by it. It is a great help for a mother, but unfortunately it can be the cause of deeper troubles.

You're not going to get a mother

In this role, in your relationship with heaven, they start out the same as you do in the role of the bride. None of them will come out of your skin, with your basic natures, your good-bad qualities, and not particularly against each other. You exert an influence on each other, but only your own words and actions were above your control. You can anger or grieve at your mom's actions, but your senses will deliberately steer your relationship along with your feelings. now I'm in my motherhood, I can finally use my experience as a bride, and show that bad relationships between mother and mother-in-law and mother-in-law are not uncommon. Well, I remember what didn't go well at the time, it's natural that I don't want to pass it on. "We can't just start on our own," he says. Somogyiné dr. Krisztina Petik psychologist - as it may easily be that what we find grieving is not what we are doing or what we are trying to do, the rest can be indifferent or even confused. More useful cow to get to know the other personif you want to please. The mother's part is that she does not want to hurt her, but when she intervenes in the life of a young couple with the excuse that she only wants you, she has violated the limit she should have respected. away from your child (emotionally or specifically), so you can't write off the roulette. This attachment can also be a cost when an adult child cannot break away from his or her mother. However, the marriage of the "child" is more important than the parent-child relationship. The let go of ignorance The main problem that arises is: the control, the inwardness, the lack of acceptance of the buyer or the weasel. In our culture, the family system works well if you push each of the subsystems - grandparents, parents, children - into a flexible one. Each subsystem performs its own function and stays in its own domain, does not "swallow" the other, take over the other functions.

Two are surfing but cooperating

My grandmother and grandmother often experience with my peers that parents really we could not translate into an adult grown up children, instead they would rather live instead, saying that young people do not (well) know much. As a young adult, I also felt this distrust, even the underestimation or even the injustice of doing something just like our parents did. On the other hand, I had repeatedly experienced the heartbreaking thrill of practicing tolerance. When I was a kid, I wondered if my child could fall asleep, even if he or she might fall off, I would love to have a mother on the frontiers of aiding and abetting. communication is clearif you set boundaries and rules, say specific questions, but this method can improve a lot in the case of non-good practice - call attention to the guidelines Somogyiné dr. Krisztina Petik. The bride and the client can work actively on your relationship: give your best, and ask your mother for help in certain situations. But clearly indicate the borderif the mother is blatant, even she herself does not exceed this limit, that is, do not connect more closely with her parents than with her spouse. For example, discussing the problem with your married couple, not with your parents and with your child. this must be accepted by the parent, but the "child" must also bear the responsibility accordingly, decide freely if necessary, resolve, and represent the new family's interests. Collaboration between the two generations is also very important for the grandchild's grandchild relationship, as it provides the children with the opportunity to be safe, secure, and a lifetime task for the grandparent. We are not obstructing either of them, but rather help to establish this privileged relationship.

Responsibility for the upbringing of children is low

You can't expect your grandparent to take on this responsibility and burden. She is not automatically a bisexual, she also has her own life, her free time or her work. When young parents ask for help, in keeping with that and respecting it, they expect that grandma will not be overpowered, ingeniously, and unexpectedly visited. Likewise, grandparents should respect parents' right to education. to reconcile the main principles of education. You can give advice and let you know if you have serious parenting problems, but by no means do you have a coalition with grandchildren against parents. It is also a common mistake for grandparents to try to protect their grandchildren's love by chewing up their parenting principles (by allowing everything or stuffing their children with gifts and sweets). There is no need for this, as the little ones cling to someone for a secure connection, not the recommendation. After all, if parents are consistent in their education, grandparenting will not eventually spoil the children, because the little ones will also learn what they can and cannot do. But if this quarrel continues without interruption, it will surely break the relationship and the family's peace, and it will cause the least damage to our lives as a whole.
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